The Power of the Pen !

Who ever said that writing a letter to bitch about a bad experience never got you anywhere????I am TRE excited that I not only got a FANTASTIC response, but I also got it in a timely manner !
SQUEEE !
Basically, when I went to the local community college to make some changes to my course schedule I had an AWFUL experience in the counceling center. That very night I sat down and wrote a letter which I sent to 3 different people at the college....the President, The Director of the Counceling Center and the Director of Human Resources.
When J and I headed out to breakfast this morning we realized we hadn't gotten the mail from yesterday so we grabbed it out of the mailbox on our way out.
Low and behold there were 3 envelopes from the college addressed to me ! ! ! !
I had to wait until we got to the restaurant as I was the one driving and J HATES it when I try to multi-task while driving.
WELL !
I got 3 apologies ! ! !
Not only that, but apparently the offender even got pulled into his boss' office and reprimanded ! ! ! ! !
YIPPEE !
I WON ! ! ! ! !
I'll have to post my letter and the responses in another entry on here so y'all can see...
I'm just SO happy !
My having written a letter actually caused action !
How empowered do I feel right now?!?!??!?!
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE ! ! ! ! ! !

Tomorrow Marks One Year...

Yup....
In less than 24 hours we'll have owned this house for 1 whole year !
Lord knows if we'll actually "celebrate" since Jason's been sick lately...
But I guess we'll see...

Still on Cloud 9

YUP !
That's me !
Even when I was shelling out the $275 for 2 text books for 2 of my classes.
I still have 2 more books to purchase for another class which will likely total over $200 but I'm not even bummed about it !
AND !
Like a GIANT 5 year old I took myself "school supply" shopping after work tonight !
YUP !
I picked out my new bookbag (am I a dweeb or WHAT?!?!?!) which is LOVELY...
Got enough spiral bound notebooks for my various classes....
Got some new pens....
AND a wonderful "assignment" book !
And like a GIANT nerd I've already packed up my bag for my first day of classes (which isn't even until 9/6 !)
In case y'all were wondering, here's what my universe will look like for the Fall semester....

Mondays
Fundamentals of Computer Science - 6:00 - 9:40 pm
Tuesdays & Thursdays
Business Law I - 8:00 - 9:15 am
Wednesdays
Accounting I - 6:30 - 9:10 pm

Sure I'm excited now...and can't wait to start...but will I be quite so joyous in a few weeks when this course load comes crashing down on my head?
WE'LL SEE ! ! ! !
:)
In the meantime, I'm just riding the wave of happiness and feel like a little kid who can't WAIT for the first day of school to hurry up and get here !

ABOUT TO BURST WITH EXCITEMENT ! ! ! ! ! !

HOLY SHIT ! ! ! ! !
I'm actually GOING BACK TO SCHOOL ! ! ! ! ! !
This morning I marched myself down to the local county college and registered for 3 - yes, count em ! - 3 courses for this fall's semester ! ! ! ! !
And they're not bullshit classes either !

I'm taking:
Accounting I
Intro to Computer Science
Business Law I

So life will become a bit of a challenge for the next couple of months.
And I cannot WAIT ! ! ! ! !
I FINALLY have a focus and direction !
On my way to the school this morning I was nervous as hell.
When I went through the doors, though, the "Grab the bull by the balls" Liz came out and took total control !
I was PRE-PARED !
And had the counselor's head spinning !
HA HA !
And how scary is it that I'm now looking into the future at Masters programs?!?!?!?!?
I have a goal.
It's name is PENN STATE
the only university I ever wanted to go to but wasn't able to go to when I graduated high school.
THEY have the Masters I want and need.
Is that just craziness or WHAT?!?!?!?!?
WOW ! ! ! ! ! !
But FIRST I must focus on doing well this semester and shoving my way into a 4-year school to complete my bachelor's.

SKA...

WEEEEEEE ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

I am
SO
EXCITED ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

I just picked up an issue of Cross Stitch Crazy (a British cross stitch magazine) and GUESS WHAT'S INSIDE?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!
A pattern so I can cross stitich ORLANDO BLOOM ! ! ! ! ! !

SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

Oh Orlando !
How hot art thou?!?!?!?!?
And now I can cross stitch your head and have you for myself ! ! ! ! !
And the BEST part is that I didn't even KNOW I was getting him ! ! ! ! ! !
This is like the best thing in the universe !
And I SOOO needed something good like this today - it's been a notsogood day.
SQUEEEEEEEE ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !
ORLANDO FOR MEEEEEE ! ! ! ! ! ! !

And I swear !
I think I should move to England ! ! !
Now that I have Stew I'm realizing that all the best bunny supplies are in the UK.
(LITERALLY there is like NOTHING here in the States !)
I'm a TOTAL whore for OK! and HELLO!
I'm an even BIGGER whore for British T.V. shows
And I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE the cross stitch mags they have ! ! ! !
They are so fan-fucking-tastic ! ! ! ! !
And TOTALLY worth the $10 I plunk down on them in my local Barnes & Noble ! ! ! ! !
That's it !
I'm packing up the kitties, and Stew and we're movin' to England ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

WOW

It's raining and thunderboomin' out here !
And I have to say...
I LOVE IT ! ! ! !
I haven't seen a good lightning storm in a VERY long time.
The only drawback is that we briefly lost power - which resulted in my paused Tivo to become very UNPAUSED and the remainder of the SVU I was watching was annihaliated ! ! ! !
EEK !
Hopefully they'll re-run that one soon ! It was REALLY GOOD !
I almost wish we'd lose power again - - - for like the rest of the night. That way J would have no option but to TALK to me. He keeps putting me off and is sighting all the computer work he has to do as the excuse.
No power = no computers = we have to talk to one another !
*sigh*
Oh well...
I'm going to go back to watching the thunderstorm now...

SQUEEE ! ! ! ! !

I am SOOOO EXCITED ! ! ! ! !
Today is Mel's SURPRISE bridal shower !
She came over for lunch yesterday and I was listening to her as she was griping about going to "some surprise party" today. She has ABSOLUTELY NO CLUE ! ! ! I LOVE IT ! ! !
I am SOO bringing my camera with me !
I can't WAIT to see her little face ! She is going to be so shocked and so happy ! ! ! !
I, of course, played dumb during our conversation, asking about where she was going and what the deal was.
Even funnier is that she had to meet up with her mom and sister afterwards and she called me shortly after that. She was like "They're such weirdo-s ! They just met me, gave me my outfit and then left !"
It was the outfit she bought for this party she has to go to today. LOL
She was totally like "What is UP with them?!?!?!"
I LOVE IT ! ! ! !
:)
I absoultely cannot WAIT to go to this party today ! ! !
It's going to be so great ! ! ! ! !

I knew I should've gone to the liquor store.,....

at least i have this lovely bottle of champagne to numb me.
JOY
but what shall i drink tomorrow??:???
SHIT !
Maybe i should go to bed,huh?????
at least i'm numb and that means i can't hurt right now....
that;s all that matters.
why me?
aren't i a goo d person?
if i am then why me?
i need to go cry now.
I certainly can't type....

Damn !

I'm officially OUT of my fabulous pre-mixed apple martini ! ! !
WAAAAHHH ! ! !
At least I got one large martini tonight as the remainder of the bottle which I'm nursing like nobody's business !
A sure sign it's a good martini?
I'm losing the feeling in my toes. AAAAAHHHH. How I love the numbness ! ! ! !
Guess what I'll be picking up tomorrow?!?!?!?!??!
YUMMY ! ! !
Particularly seeing as how I'll be having LUNCH with my friend Mel on Friday !
SQUEEE !
She's my buddy who's gotten me HOOKED on fancy martinis ! ! ! !
I haven't seen her in like FOREVER so I'm VERY excited about seeing her on Friday !
Not only that, but I'm STOKED that she'll get to meet STEW ! ! ! ! !
YIPPEE !

Wretched Dreams...

I was having a horrible dream last night and, unfortunately, when I went back to sleep it continued.
UGH.
And it's still fucking with me.
Ya know ! I spent my night baking for my friend's family and my department at work. I did something good ! And THIS is what I get? Nightmares?!?!?!?
SIGH
And now I'm exhausted.....and can't get some more rest seeing as how I have to leave for work in 40 minutes.

Working Towards A Resolution...

and better Kharma ! ! ! !

So, on my drive in this morning something came over me.
And a decision was made.
Ever since those two girls were nasty with me at St. Pat's I've been angry. Angry at them for their actions and angry at J for his lack of action. I've gotten pathetic excuses for apologies from them and had resolved to not go to the wedding one of them is having in October.
Here's what I've decided as of my drive in this morning...
I'm tired of being angry about this.
I do NOT forgive them, but I want to try to resolve this.
When I spoke to each of them I was furious - I bit my tongue so I wouldn't cuss them out and make matters worse.
I'm a mull it over kind of gal by nature and that's what I've been doing.
My resolution is this.
I want their phone numbers.
I will use these phone numbers to call them individually and have a conversation with each of them. A conversation that will start with "I'm calling to bury the hatchet" but that will involve much more. In order to truly put this behind me, I need them to UNDERSTAND what they did wrong. Something I don't think they do. I don't think J explained it to them at ALL and that is a problem. The way I see it, I can make the calls, explain WHY I've been so angry and if they apologize for what I tell them about then I'll consider these issues closed. Neither of them seem to get the fact that not saying "hello" or "good-bye" to me wasn't the big issue. Their attack on me was the major thing.
Once I made this decision I actually felt a little better about it all.
I am a grudge holder by nature, but I want to try to not be in these two cases.
I've never particularly cared for either of these girls, but I also know that this situation is hurting J. Did they bring this on themselves by doing it? Yes. Did J bring this on himself for not handling it in a timely manner? Absolutely. Yet, I'm willing to try to handle what none of them could because I want an end to this. I don't want to be friends with them - I just don't want to have to hate them anymore. And, with any luck, after they get married they'll fade off into the distance and we won't have to deal with them anymore - - - nature will take it's course and they'll just disappear.
:)
I'm not budging on the other issue. That little whore better hope she's not crossing the street on a day I'm driving down it because I WILL run her down.
But these two I'm willing to try to put to bed.
That has to count for something, right?
And this will officially cut the ongoing issues J and I have in half....
not bad, I should think...
So let's just hope they're both smart enough to play nice with me so this can rest finally.

One Minute I'm UP....

and the next I'm DOWN yet again....

What the fuck is WRONG with me?!?!??!?!
WHY can't I be HAPPY for my friends?!?!?!?
Why am I so selfish? I don't want to be.
:(

Last night I stumbled on an old friend's website - - - I check in on him from time to time to see how he's doing....

He's apparently engaged and his fiancee is having his baby.
I immediately sent him a super happy comment and congratulated him.

While I'm happy he's found someone to love - someone to spend his life with - I'm sad for myself.....

Same old shit, right?

Wah, Wah, Wah.....
My boyfriend will live with me and date me for 4 years and talk about wanting to marry me (for the past 2 1/2 years now) but won't pull the trigger....
WAH ! ! ! !

I know, I'm a fucking brat, right?

I just wish I could feel only joy in these situations.
I wish the receipt of this news didn't always send me into a downward spiral of despair.
Why can't I just be happy for my friends and not think of my own issues?!?!?!

I am so fucked up.

As a PS to the story, this friend IMMEDIATELY e-mailed me an ecstatic e-mail about how he is and his questions as to how I am. Not only that, but he did a whole write up in his blog. (The boy was obviously happy to hear from me.) I know all he's ever wanted was to be someone's husband and father - - - and now he's getting his wish fulfilled. And I am happy for him. He's been a TOTAL mess over the years - getting mixed up in everything from being a born-again-Christian to dating a porn girl. He's a human rollercoaster and I've been there to councel, yell at, and support him through it all. I have no intention of making him feel anything other than my happiness for his current situation. I have to deal with my own shit - - - it's no one's problem but my own.

Scrapbooking....

is EVIL ! ! ! !
It's addictive and downright EVIL, I say !
I currently have 3, yes, 3 !, scrapbooks going....
One is for all of the vacations J and I have taken together....
One is for pictures of my friends over the years....
And the last is one that I can blame a co-worker of mine for ! It's a book to house all of the best photographs I've taken. I'm collecting them together, enlarging them to 5x7s and then mounting them - one per page.
I feel like a scrapbooking loon !
Like I need to join scrapbookers anonymous or something like that ! ! ! !
EEK !
Though, through all of this scrapbooking mania I've gotten a few things...
I've found pictures I've forgotten about that have flooded me with wonderful memories....
Not only that, as I look back at what I've accomplished so far with the scrapbooks I'm actually enjoying the pages I've put together and thinking "not too shabby" !
:)
I'm still exhausted as I've not so much as napped today....
I was busy cleaning out my craft room so that J could install a closet organizer....
Well, it's in and the room is a DISASTER area....
I now need containers to further organize my closet and to cluster like things together...
It is, afterall, a craft room...and that means LOTS of small items and random things...
At any rate, I'm stopping now after having given up on my craft room and helping J with the closet organizer he installed in our bedroom closet I'm ready to fall out......
I've got one more load of laundry to go into the dryer and then I'm calling it a day !
I'm starting to see a ray of sunshine peek through the clouds that have been hanging over my head for years now and it's really a great feeling !
Cheers y'all and hope you have quiet, peacful and fulfilling Sunday nights !
:)

The Official Announcement...

Need.Sleep.So.Tired.

Didn't get much sleep last night....
Bad night....
At least it's Sunday and I can slog around and not have to worry about being at work...
And hopefully things will even out and I'll be able to SLEEP tonight....
UGH.

WOW !

GEEZ !
I must've needed that !
I crashed out this afternoon and ended up sleeping for 4 1/4 hours ! ! ! !
And my head isn't even killing me like it ususally does when I oversleep....guess I was just catching up on some of the sleep I've been missing.
HUH.
Though now I feel like I've accomplished NOTHING today - - - which is sort of true.
Oh well !
Tomorrow's another day !
:)
Now...
Hopefully I'll be able to get some sleep tonight !

Bad...Bad...Bad...Bad...Bad....Bad....Bad...Good !

Bad thing #1 - J's friend who I don't like is here tonight and is JUST starting to do what he's here to do...this is going to be a LOOOOOONNNGGGG night....

Bad thing #2 - I've so far taken out a bottle of wine and am currently working on a VERY large strawberry daqueri.....

Bad thing #3 - I'm STILL wearing my bra and undies ! ! ! I HATE wearing them but do during the day ! ! ! ! They are normally shed the SECOND I get home ! HOWEVER ! We have a fucking GUEST ! Which means I cannot be so free as to have the girls loose and with the shorts I'm wearing not having undies would result in an instant wedgie which would reveal my lack of undies. And considering what a skanky ho this guy is...I REALLY don't want to be his personal eye candy ! ! ! ! ! !

Bad thing #4 - as a result of all of my drinking I'm starting to feel a little tipsy.....and I'm trying VERY hard not to talk too much because if I do J will realize how loopy I'm feeling....

Bad thing #5 - During the dinner that we JUST ate I was feeling a little dizzy from the drinking....notsogood....

Bad thing #6 - I HAVE to go to work tomorrow....no working from home for me ! ! ! !

Bad thing #7 - (and this is the FINAL bad thing, I promise !) I don't want to stop drinking because this is what I need to deal with this creep being in my house ! ! ! !

Good thing - (why not end on a happy note, right???) I'm leaning towards one name for the bunny.... Stew.....THANKS MATT R ! ! ! ! It's not his "official" name but he seems to like it and I'm really starting to like it myself ! We'll see....I'll make my decision in another day or two and announce his name at that point....

OY.
Please don't let me puke.
I haven't puked for like 7-8 years....
That would NOT be good...
I'm going to just sit here for a bit and drink some water...
It's amazing how quickly one can get drunk when truly motivated.....
It's taken me all of about an hour.....
Keep your fingers crossed, y'all, that I don't puke !
:)