Just when I thought maybe things were going to calm down...

MORE FUCKING DRAMA ! ! ! ! !
ABSOLUTE CRAZINESS !
This time it's all about crazy, nosey, psycho neighbors !
The mood I'm in this week, I may just have to gather the other neighbors together and plot a revolt ! ! ! !
I'm working from home tomorrow and am DEFINITELY going to visit our one neighbor who seems to be this fuckers target.
This motherfucker apparently doesn't work and doesn't sleep and likes to watch his neighbors and complain about them and wander the neighborhood at night being nosey and shit. Like, he knows what the one neighbor's new furniture looks like, not because he's been invited over......
The fact that we don't have curtains in most of our windows makes this information leave me with a VERY uncomfortable feeling.
So can you GUESS what I'll be doing tomorrow and over the weekend?!?!?!?!??!?!
So now on top of everything else I get to be paranoid.

To add onto this lovely pile of shit I've got MORE drama from that guy I bumped 2 weeks ago.
That fucker is trying to get me to replace his WHOLE rear bumper over a scratch ! ! !
NOT
GONNA
HAPPEN !
So that should, unfortunately, carry over to tomorrow....

Can this fucking week just fucking end already???
What the FUCK is up with the universe?!?!?!
It's like this has been the TOTAL week from hell !
UGH !

School Drama

So, I've been taking this "Computer Science" class....and it's been a DISASTER.
My last class was on Monday. I determined I couldn't take it anymore and had to get out of the class and see what I could do to utilize the money I've already put out on this class...
To give you the full picture the following is the letter I've written to the dean who handles the computer science classes:
-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Dean Waite:

I am writing to you as I find it very important to bring my recent experiences in a Computer Science class to your attention. As of today I am no longer enrolled in COMS 112-41, Fundamentals of Computer Science, and have had to change this class to COMS 110-43, Computer Concepts, as a direct result of the professor teaching the COMS 112-41 class. Unfortunately you were not on campus this week and I was not able to bring this information to you personally. I did, however, speak with both Mr. Vincent Poisella of the counseling center and Dean Peter Schoch to try to adjust my schedule as best as possible.

Mr. Karl Model is incompetent. He has no grasp of the subject matter and is completely incapable of teaching what he doesn’t know to his students. I have attended three classes with Mr. Model and was so completely outraged during the third session that I chose to leave the class at the break and immediately remove myself from the class permanently effective this morning. To help you to better understand what I am referring to, I have kept some notes on the various things that have happened during class time and would like to share my observations and experiences with you.

Our first class was on September 12. Mr. Model arrived to class late, stating that he’d been wrapped up with giving a presentation trying to “pitch” having a game programming class offered at the college. Upon his arrival, he had no idea of how to open the classroom door and had to find out what the combination was. He was completely disorganized and didn’t know how to so much as log into his computer. To add insult to injury, he was not even sure of which textbooks were required for the course. Approximately half of the class had purchased 4 textbooks including “COMS 112:C++ & EXCEL 2000 CUST TEXT/PKG W/ESS MS ACC 03 LEVI”, retailing at $67.00, and “COMPUTER SCI ILLUMINATED (SET:TXT/ST LECT COMP)(W/CD) (P)”, retailing at $104.50. After a considerable amount of time debating both with himself and the class as to whether or not the “COMS 112:C++ & EXCEL 2000 CUST TEXT/PKG W/ESS MS ACC 03 LEVI” book set was necessary, he gave the class a 30 minute break so he could “go take this up with the Dean” and recommended that those in the class who had not yet opened this book set use the break to return those books as this was the final day to return textbooks to the bookstore for a refund. He returned to the class without an answer and requested to borrow my “COMS 112:C++ & EXCEL 2000 CUST TEXT/PKG W/ESS MS ACC 03 LEVI” book set, as I’d already opened the set and could not return it, so he could determine for himself if he would want to use these books in class. He then stumbled through giving us an overview of the class and reviewing the syllabus. At the conclusion of this he connected his own personal computer to show us a video game that he’d created and to try to explain how this particular class was applicable to the video game. Mr. Model also explained that he was teaching this class with little notice as the original professor decided not to teach it at the last moment. I was willing to give him the benefit of the doubt and consider that perhaps his lack of preparedness was a result of his jumping into this teaching assignment without much notice and hope that the next class would prove that he was more together than his initial impression gave.

The second class was on September 19. Mr. Model was on time for class, a good sign I thought, and returned my textbooks that he’d borrowed. He announced to the class that we did not need these books and he apologized to anyone who’d already opened the set and was now out the money for those books. My hopes of a turnaround in Mr. Model’s professionalism and preparedness was quickly quashed. During this class Mr. Model again brought out his personal computer to show us some short films that his previous students had made for him as a project. After which, he began to go through the PowerPoint slides for Chapter 2 and attempted to explain to the class how to do conversions between binary, hexadecimal, decimal and octal numbers. As he fumbled through the equations, he seemed to be completely confused and he was unable to apply the correct equations to the correct type of conversions. It got to the point where some of the students in the class, who’d had previous experience with these conversions, were telling him how to complete the problems. During this time he continuously said “I’m learning too !” and “I’m not very smart” or “I’m not very good at this.” It was blatantly obvious that he had no idea how to do these conversions and his feeble attempt to muddle through them did nothing but confuse the class and leave those of us without previous experience floundering to understand.

I, personally, am lucky enough to work in a company full of engineers and people with vast knowledge about computer science. I was speaking with a manager in my department about my experience in class and not understanding a thing the teacher was trying to do. The manager was kind enough to take the time to show me how to do these conversions and to explain to me how the systems work. Again, I’m very fortunate to have this resource available to me but please think of those students in this class who do not have such resources. They are left to try to figure it out for themselves based on the incoherent babble of an instructor without the knowledge base of the material plus a textbook which leaves a lot to be desired in terms of explaining such things.

The third class was last night, September 26. While waiting for Mr. Model to arrive, I was in the hallway with my classmates. We were all talking about the class and Mr. Model. It was everyone’s opinion that the instructor has no idea of what he’s doing and that this class is a waste of our time and energy. Mr. Model was again late for the class and again was unsure as to the door combination to open the classroom. Approximately half of the class was not in attendance at this session. He told the class that he could no longer bring in his personal computer as he was told that it was not allowed. He then debated with himself and the class as to whether or not he should give us pop quizzes to see if we are all understanding the material. Multiple students said that they’d had problems doing the homework and he offered to go over it with us.

We began with a problem that required us to convert the octal number “605” into binary. It took Mr. Model an hour and 40 minutes to try to do this problem and to try to also convert the binary form back to the octal. During his attempt at this, it was again blatantly obvious that he had no idea of which equation to apply to the number as well as no clue what he was doing. Out of pure frustration, one student went up to the board, took a marker and showed him how to convert the “6”. He seemed to understand at that point which equation was to be used to do this conversion, yet he continued to show the fact that he did not understand the concept of conversions at all. When it came to converting the “0” in octal “605”, he argued with the class stating that octal “0” would be binary “0”, not binary “000”. He challenged any student who would try to tell him that octal “0” is, in fact, binary “OOO” and say “Well why is that? Prove it.” Mr. Model then got the bright idea to “quiz” us and to have all of us write down what we’d done so far on the board and for each of us to do the conversion of “5” to complete the problem and to turn it into him as a “check to see if we all understand how to do this.” The whole class was done with the remaining conversion in minutes. It seemed that we all understood how to do it based on the student’s explanation and therefore managed to finish the problem quickly. Mr. Model then tried to complete the problem himself. He was unable to do so without assistance from yet another student. The student went to the board and wrote out how to convert the “5” in octal “605”. Mr. Model then got back into the argument of why the octal “0” would be a binary “000” at which point the student had to again explain it to him. At this point Mr. Model blurted out that he only has a degree in art and that he’s a self taught programmer and that he’s learning too. We then were given a break, at which time I collected my belongings and went to the counseling center to find out what I could do to get out of this class and either be reimbursed or transfer to another class.

Please note that this first class date was also the final day to drop a class with a 75% refund as well as the final day to add/drop a class without going through a Dean. Neither of these activities could have taken place as this was our first day of class and it is an evening class, hence leaving a student with the choice to either drop a class they have not yet taken for a 75% refund or to drop a class they have not yet taken and replace it with another class they have not yet taken. The second class was the final day to drop a class with a 50% refund which leaves students in our particular situation without recourse as the same issues apply as would the previous week. I’d think you’d have to agree with me that this whole set up does not make much sense in terms of giving a student a chance to first attend a class, get a feel for it, and then to adjust their schedule as necessary.

This morning I was faced with three options. As an individual with a full-time job, the scope of these options are narrowed based on my available time. I could continue to take COMS 112-41 and subject myself to an instructor who has no capability to teach this class, continue to be frustrated with the situation and learn nothing. My second option would be to withdrawal from the class and be forced to accept that I would get no reimbursement as the date for receiving my tuition back, even in part, was past. My third option would be to try to find another computer science class I could take, hope there were still openings in that class, and find a Dean to plead my case to so that I wouldn’t be throwing money out the window and I’d at least have 3 credits at the end of the semester in some computer science class.

I chose the third option, but not happily. I signed up for COMS 112-41 so that I could learn the material that class was designed to teach. Due to the negligence of Mr. Model I am now forced to take COMS 110-43 which, from my understanding, is a very basic computer class that entails such things as “this is a monitor, this is a CPU”, etc. which I feel is a great disadvantage to me. I also have had to spend an additional $122.75 on the required textbooks for the COMS 110-43 class and have had a great deal of my time and energy wasted in this process. I was told that attempting to get into COMS 120 would be near impossible, regardless of my work experience, as either COMS 112 or COMS 110 is a prerequisite for this class. I have been in the workforce for 8+ years and have taken a number of classes regarding the various software systems available. I am well aware of the basics of a computer and its software at this point. I will now have to sit in a class that I consider remedial to my abilities, could likely do in my sleep, and learn nothing because Mr. Model is incapable of doing the job he is charged with; a reality that I find repugnant.

I urge you to please re-assess Mr. Model’s assignment as the instructor for COMS 112-41. He is unfit to teach this class and cannot, himself, understand the materials he is attempting to teach the students. How can you justify installing a person with an art degree into the position of being an Fundamentals of Computer Science instructor, regardless of his self-taught programming status, when he obviously has never had the training required to teach this class? It is highly likely that as an individual seeking a degree in art Mr. Model would never have even so much as taken a Fundamentals of Computer Science course. How can he measure our understanding of a subject if he doesn’t understand it even slightly?

If you would like to discuss this issue further, I will make myself available to meet with you.

Thank you for your time and consideration.

Drama, Drama, Drama

OY !

We've got drama at school...
Drama at work....
And now drama at home !

GGGGGGGGGGGRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

I guess it's a good thing I'm not too horribly mentally unstable, huh?

More to come on these topics.....

One Step Forward...

Yesterday I officially started the process of getting my credits from UCONN transferred to the college I'm at now so that I can be one step closer to getting this Associates Degree....
They tell me their review process takes up to 4 weeks (but then quietly stated that it likely won't take that long).
I have a feeling I may have to argue a couple of my credits because they don't exactly match the requirements of the college I'm in but in one of the cases the class is more advanced than what they're requiring. I made a notation on the review request form about this set of credits in particular.
So I guess we'll see what happens.
At least it's one more step in the right direction towards my goal of a Masters.
:)

So THIS is what sleep deprivation feels like !

Yup.
No sleepy for the Lizzie last night !
NOPE
NOPE
NOPE
Another "fun-filled" adventure between J and me.
The issue this time?
First was him getting home at 9:15pm....
And my ruining dinner as a result.
And us not getting to spend ANY time together on one of my few nights home as a result.
Also, it hit me yesterday....
10 years ago I was starting my first semester in college.
And I had all of these hopes and dreams.
Here it is, 10 years later, and I'm starting back at college and all I'd done before was for nothing.
I'm 28, looking at 29 soon, have a GREAT job, but no degree so no future, am not married and have no children and likely won't have either any time soon.
J's been back and forth about the whole "us getting married" thing now FOREVER.
A year ago as of Labor Day he was "going" to propose.
A year since that time came and went.
This past February he ASKED my mother's permission to marry me.
That was 7 months ago.
We fight ENDLESSLY about the marriage issue.
He keeps claiming he's "trying to keep it a surprise".
Uh Huh.
Right.
And now I'm in school and I feel that I have a path to choose.
I can do the Associates Degree - likely completing it by the end of next Fall's semester and then launch into the accelerated program to get my Bachelors which = ALL DAY EVERY SATURDAY for the next 2 years of my life, after which I'd start working on my Masters online which will take god-knows how long.
OR
I can choose to be someone's wife and mother.
I can't do both.
And that's both my fault and J's.
Mine because I'm the one who waited so long.
J's because if he'd have proposed even THIS past year we could've planned a wedding for next year which wouldn't've interfered with my accelerated program which I'll be starting next Spring.
If he even DID bother to propose at this point I'd have to wait until I was done with my accelerated program to get married as I REFUSE to throw something together like I had to last time - that's another 3 years out so I'd be 31 going on 32. Any time before that I couldn't because ALL of my SATURDAYS are filled so that = no wedding not to mention that it also = no honeymoon because, for arguments sake, if I DID take off one Saturday to get married, then I certainly couldn't take off MORE for a honeymoon ! ! ! !
If I want/can have kids I'd have to start IMMEDIATELY which wouldn't work because how the hell am I supposed to be working full-time, going to school full time while pregnant and then, post pregnancy, while having a newborn to juggle??????? And if I wait until after I'm done then it will be too late for me. My opportunities will be gone in the next 6-7 years....that is, if there even is an opportunity at all.

J doesn't get it.
He seems to think that I can have "anything" I want if I really put forth the effort.
HUH.
Must be nice to be a man.
Not have to worry about bearing children.
Not have to worry about how that will effect your life in terms of being PREGNANT for 9 months, giving BIRTH and then RECOUPING from the pregnancy & birth all while trying to have a career and grow yourself through getting an education on a rather fixed timetable.
I call my views and realizations realisitc.
He thinks I'm being "depressed" and "negative".
He JUST doesn't get it.
Though, he never really has, has he? I mean, he's strung me along for 2 1/2 + years now talking about getting engaged, right?
He "claims" that he knows how important it is to me and that he's taken it all into consideration.
Yeah.
It shows.
(looks at empty ring finger)
Oh wait.
I guess it doesn't - there's nothing to see.

What it boils down to is this, I guess.
I can't give up what I don't already have.
I DON'T have a commitment from J.
I DON'T have an proposal from J (though I've told him is NOT about the ring, but about the COMMITMENT - that he doesn't even NEED to give me a ring if that's what's holding him back in terms of being able to afford one).
I DON'T have a wedding to worry about planning with J.
All that means I DON'T have to "deal" with having any children anytime soon.
All of these things are things I don't have and, therefore can't give up, right?
All I do have is my job, myself and a WHOLE lot of bullshit talk about getting engaged/married coming out of J's mouth.
Ain't much.
But I suppose that answers my question about what path to take, eh?
I can't give up what I don't have, but I guess I just have to close the door on the possiblities in order to complete the path I have to choose.

Gettin' Into The Groove...

So, not to jinx myself or anything like that, but I do believe I've hit the "groove" of my Business Law class tonight in terms of getting through my assignments !
SQUEEE ! ! ! !
All my homework is DONE DONE DONE for the next class on Thursday morning !
Tomorrow is Accounting with satan professor...should be interesting considering she STILL hasn't responded to my e-mail regarding one of the homework questions...which TOTALLY annoys me and I plan to address tomorrow night in terms of logically stating that the answer it totally dependent on the necessary context which is unavailable in the question provided.

Even greater news than my getting into my bus law groove.....
H and Mel are coming to DINNER on Thursday night !
SQUEEE ! ! ! ! ! !
I get to see and hang out with my friends ! ! !
I've seen Mel lately, but H has been AWOL for about a month and 1/2 now and I've really missed her.
YIPPEE ! ! ! !
The three are being reunited the day after tomorrow ! ! ! ! !

ZZZZZZZ...

Can't I go back to bed?!?!?!?!
Last week is a bit of a blur - - - -
I started school and have hit the ground running. For "understanding that a lot of (us) work full-time" my accounting professor sure knows how to pile on the homework assignments !
I spent yesterday from 7am - 6pm studying with a 1/2 hour lunch break tucked in there where I was basically still studying but it was on the couch while I ate my mac & cheese. Thanks to my putting in all that time my accounting assignments are done, my business law assignments are 1/2 done and I have a crick in my neck that is KILLING me.
Tonight I attend my first Computer Science class - - - the longest class I have at 3 hrs 40 min.
Fun, right?
I have to leave work early today for this class - which means I have to get there early - which technically means I have to get out of here at like 7am....which likely won't be happening.
Boss man is out this week and next - so I can do homework on my lunch break without much issue - which is good - and if I'm a little late getting in this morning it shouldn't be a big deal.
This adjustment period of getting my school groove back is ROUGH !
By Thursday of last week I was ready to fall over - literally the walking dead !
I should probably run and get ready to go, huh?
Le Sigh.
Hopefully I'll get used to this new schedule soon !
:)

The Lightbulb Hath FINALLY Begun To Glow Above His Head ! ! ! ! !

PRAISE BE !
He FINALLY gets it ! ! !

Over the weekend J and I went to Mel's for a bbq.
Mel and I were drinking like fiends and somehow it came up as to which high school she'd gone to. When she told J which one it was he was like "How old are you?" She responded with "WHY???? Do you KNOW someone who went to my school?!?!?!" To which he relpied "One person" and then mumbled something about not being able to talk about it because of me.
I knew who they were both referring to.
And Mel just wouldn't let up - and I was giggling as quietly as I possibly could.

The next day J and I went to lunch and he brought up that conversation. Apparently he didn't think I was paying attention and that I didn't know who he knew that went to Mel's school. I then told him, AGAIN, about her little history. That back in high school she was at the center of a big scandal. That she liked a YOUNGER guy who had a girlfriend and she did EVERYTHING in her power to break them up. She was sugary sweet to the guy and a mega bitch to the girl. SOUND FAMILIAR!?!?!?!
I could LITERALLY see the light bulb above his head go on.
The conversation ended rather quickly but he did say he didn't know what her ulterior motives were and he doesn't want to know.
He looked rather like a deer in headlights as he said this - shaking his head and staring off into no where.
DING DING DING ! ! ! !
He FINALLY gets it ! ! !
It's only taken HOW MANY YEARS?!?!?!?
The important thing is that, yet again, he's realized that I'm RIGHT and have been all along.
A friend at work has told me on many occasions that I'm a good judge of character - that I have something about me that reads people completely and correctly.
Well DUH !
My gut hasn't been wrong yet - I've never had an "AH HA !" moment about ANYONE before.
I just wish J would have the same instincts so we don't have to keep going through these exercises ! Either that or I wish he'd learn to trust mine !
The most important thing, though, is that the light, indeed, did finally go on and he now GETS IT.
SQUEEE !

First Class

Well, I do believe that now that I've actually attended my first "Business Law" class that I can officially say I'm no longer scared of that one !
The teacher seems nice enough - a bit flaky, but nice.
I'm one of about 4 adults in the class - everyone else is 18 and fresh out of high school.
The thing that shocked me the most about my juvenile classmates is how far up their asses their heads were. When it was time to go around the room to say who we were and why we were taking the class and what our goals were, etc. ALL of these girls had the same response "I want to start my own business." That's great and all, but they didn't specify WHAT KIND of business. The teacher obviously noticed this as well and by the 3rd one she finally asked "And what kind of business is that?" to which she got the response "I don't know". The final young girl who had to give her schpeel responded with "Um, like, I want to major in Accounting so, like, I can have a job that I can do from home so I, like, don't ever have to leave and, like, if I have kids and everything I can, like, stay home with them and still work." The teacher couldn't help herself - she laughed. She looked at the girl and, through her giggles, said "Do you HAVE any children?" The girl looked at her, cocked her head, and responded with a bouncy "No, not yet !" "Good luck with that", the teacher responded, still giggling. She then composed herself and told the girl "Look, we need to talk. Pretend all these other people aren't in this class right now, o.k." and she then proceeded to explain to this kid what LIFE is and how it works and that the concept of having it all - kids, a career, etc all from the comfort of your home is simply not realistic. I'll be surprised to see this girl in another class.
Aside from class, the syllabus seems simple enough and I don't think it should be too hard of a class. I worked on my first homework assignment last night and only got 1/2 way through it. Part of the problem is that I have SO much to say about the topics. The two questions are essentially essay questions and they are both having to do with men/women equality cases which is a topic that makes me a bit, how shall I say?, fiesty. I am naturally a VERY opinionated person and I have to try to harness myself at least a little because I can tend to rant and I want to avoid doing that. I want to make my argument concise and thorough without sounding like I'm on a soapbox. So question one is complete. And now we have one more to go before tomorrow morning.
Tonight is my first Accounting class. Hopefully this one will go as smoothly as Business Law did !

AM

Just got jolted out of bed by a nightmare staring my mother.
GREAT !
Thanks Mom !
Anyway...
It's my first day of classes today...
It's the 8am for me so I've been waking up every 15-20 minutes or so since 3am.
Needless to say, I'm a little less than rested.
UGH.
BUT !
I'm not nervous yet which is good - "yet" being the operative word here, of course.
I read Chapter 1 of my text book last night and even worked some of the "end of chapter questions" so I'm feeling fairly confident that I'll at least have a CLUE what they're talking about...
Which is good...
But, following class today I have to immediately get on a conference call on my way back into the office followed by my first new hire coming in (which I've TOTALLY not prepared for ! EEK !)
This is going to be one hell of a day !
And if I can survive then good - because I have to start all over again tomorrow (the only difference being that I'll be in an evening class - but I'll still have to be at work earlier than normal).
Wish me luck !

EGO BOOST !

Well, last night we went to Mel's party and were the LAST ones to leave...
And it was quite the interesting night...
BUT !
I'll just stick to the subject line of this entry for now and leave out all the other gory details...
Last night I overheard something that made me SOOOO happy...
Without her realizing I could hear her, Mel was telling a couple of people that if she could do it all over again H and I would be in her bridal party...
*TEAR*
How sweet is she????
She and I had only known one another a short amount of time when she got engaged and I certainly didn't think she'd ask me regardless of how much time we were spending together...so it's not like I was expecting it and she regrets it later and I'm like "AH HA ! ! !"...
It just feels good to know that we really are that good of friends...
That if she were to have gotten engaged a little later on I'd have been part of it all.
I'd already determined - without anyone's knowledge - that if I ever do get married and we're still friends that she and H would be co-maids of honor just b/c they are truly my two best friends in the world...
It's nice to know that she thinks as much of our friendship as I do.
:)

A Year Ago....

A year ago I made a decision....
A decision that getting a house was more of a pressing issue than getting engaged...
I did this not to be a martyr, but moreso because I knew that getting out of our apartment was the most important thing for both of us at that time...
I nearly didn't make that decision because I was leaning towards being selfish...
And I stopped myself from thinking like that and chose to think of us as a whole rather than just focus on my own wants and needs...
And here it is a year later...
And I'm sad...
Because a year ago we were supposed to be headed to Ireland for a week and 1/2...
And J's plan for that trip was to propose to me...
And it's now been a whole year gone by and he still hasn't bothered to do it...
And this Labor Day weekend is just a slap in the face of a reminder that thinking of the whole rather than yourself is not always the right thing to do...
Sometimes all it gets you is fucked over and sitting by yourself on a Saturday morning wondering what the fuck you did to deserve this...
Last year, knowing J's plan, I'd figured on planning our wedding for the fall of this year...
So much for my great ideas and plans, huh?
I'm now looking at a year later and realizing that even if he did bother to do it at this point that I would have to wait at least another year before I could even get married...
I'd have the "joy" of being a 29 year old bride, looking 30 in the face and having to deal with the reality that I'm not going to be having any children until I'm at least 33 or 34 - and by then it may be too late if it isn't already and those children may never happen...
The flip side of the equation is this...
If I were to walk away now I'd be in the same boat.
I'd have to start all over again with someone new - and try to build a relationship with them...
And hope that they'd want to marry me...
And hope we'd be happy together...
Then I'm yet again looking at being a 30 something bride and childless...
Great.
Why the fuck do I even bother?
If this is the reality of my life why should I bother with wanting to get married at any point?
For the simple fact that the likelihood of my ever having a child is fleeting and if I am unable to do that then why do I ever need to marry anyone?
Fuck me.
I need a drink.
And as luck has it today is the WINE FESTIVAL and I'll be going in a few hours !
WHOO !
Then tomorrow is Mel's fiesta !
And then I'll be ENCOURAGED to drink even MORE ! ! ! !
SQUEE !
Then comes Monday.
Maybe I should just say fuck hiking and cancel it.
Why bother?
Besides it's getting too cold outside and I don't tolerate the cold very well.
Though for Monday night the next door neighbor has invited us over for a bbq.
So we'll go to that.
Then on Tuesday I start school.
That should help keep my mind off of all this shit, right?
Not only that, but it's also something for ME.
Something to make ME better.
Something COMPLETELY SELFISH.
If I'm not home as often anymore than TOUGH SHIT.
I'm doing this for ME and no one else !
All of my nails have started to break - so I finished them off with the clippers this morning.
I'm seriously considering chopping my hair off as well.
I'm about to make a new start - a reinvention of myself.
Why not change my outside as well?

OUTRAGE ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

WHAT THE FUCK is WRONG with these IDIOTS?!?!?!?!?!?
Yeah - it's all about pushing an agenda....PP couldn't POSSIBLY be interested in HELPING WOMEN who have NO OTHER ALTERNATIVE due to a disaster ! ! ! ! !
It COMPLETELY blows my mind that people can be so fucking stupid and live with such blinders on ! ! ! ! !
GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR


--------------------------------------------------

Contraceptives Giveaway Blasted
By Susan Jones
CNSNews.com Senior Editor
September 01, 2005

(CNSNews.com) - "Did you escape the hurricane without your birth control?" asks Planned Parenthood of Houston and Southeast Texas.

"As a courtesy to women fleeing Hurricane Katrina, we will offer one free cycle (one month) of birth control or one free Emergency Contraception kit to women" who come to a Houston-area Planned Parenthood clinic and produce a valid Louisiana or Mississippi driver's license.

The group's website says the offer is good until September 10.

The generosity does not impress a pro-life group that considers birth control pills and emergency contraception abortifacients.

"It is absolutely unconscionable that Planned Parenthood would use the tragedy of hurricane Katrina to push its shameless agenda on the American public," said Jim Sedlak, executive director of American Life League's STOPP International.

Thousands of people displaced by the Hurricane are being moved from the New Orleans Superdome to the Houston's Astrodome.

"In New York City in 2001, Planned Parenthood used the 9/11 attacks to publicize its programs by offering free contraceptives and abortions for the week after the terrorists struck," said Sedlak.

"Now the organization is exploiting one of the worst natural disasters in American history for cheap publicity by offering one month's supply of free birth control and so-called emergency contraception to victims of Katrina.

"If Planned Parenthood really wants to help, it should donate a portion of the millions of dollars in profits it makes every year to aid in the victims' plights," Sedlak said.

He called Planned Parenthood's latest stunt disgusting and inappropriate but not surprising: "The bottom line is that Planned Parenthood is out to promote its own agenda and will stop at nothing to take advantage of an opportunity to do so."

1 Down...1 to Go

Well, I made it through day 1 of all day meetings at work. OY !
I was there yesterday from 7:30 am to 8:00 pm.
No lunch.
No break.
Nothing.
Today will be more of the same.
Squee...not.
At least I'm not going in to work tomorrow - I'd requested to work from home some time ago and it was approved.
I cannot WAIT for this day to just be OVER !
At least these days are the exception and not the rule - otherwise I would not be a very happy girl.
Ah well...must go now and trudge myself to work.
Wish me luck !